Saint Lucia: The Oregon Town That’s More Sus Than a…

Saint Lucia: The Oregon Town That's More Sus Than a Creepy Guy in a Trenchcoat

TL;DR: You could easily get “Saint Sucker'd” by Saint Lucia in Oregon.

The Suspicious History of Saint Lucia

Saint Lucia, Oregon, is a town located in Marion County, about 7 miles north of Salem. It was founded in 1851 by a group of French Catholics, but don't let that fool you. This town has more skeletons in its closet than a graveyard at midnight.

A Town of Sketchy Characters

Over the years, Saint Lucia has attracted a colorful cast of characters, including:

• The Hairy Hermit: A local legend who lived in a cave in the nearby hills, subsisting on berries and dead animals.
• The Witch of the Woods: An old woman who was rumored to practice black magic and curse anyone who crossed her path.
• The Gravedigger with a Shovel to Die For: A morbidly obese man who found love in a morgue and spent his days digging graves, humming “Thriller” under his breath.

Saint Lucia: Where the Paranormal Comes Alive

Saint Lucia is a hotbed of paranormal activity. Locals swear they've seen ghosts, heard disembodied voices, and even witnessed a UFO landing in a nearby field. If you're into the spooky, this town is your Disneyland.

The Case of the Missing Cows

In 1967, a baffling case of bovine abductions shook Saint Lucia. Several cows vanished from local farms overnight, leaving behind no trace. The town suspected aliens, but no extraterrestrial suspects were ever apprehended.

Suspicious Real Estate

Real estate in Saint Lucia is as dodgy as a used car salesman. Houses are known to have hidden structural problems, poltergeist infestations, and even criminal pasts. If you're considering buying a home here, have it exorcised first.

The Curse of Saint Lucia

According to local lore, Saint Lucia is cursed. Anyone who stays in town for too long will experience a series of misfortunes, including:

• Losing their hair
• Growing extra toes
• Falling in love with a goat

If You Know, You Know…

Why did the psychic in Saint Lucia lose her job?

Because she kept seeing dead people who wanted a refund.

Saint Lucia: A Town Where Suspicion Is a Way of Life

In conclusion, Saint Lucia, Oregon, is a town shrouded in mystery, suspicion, and the occasional paranormal encounter. If you're looking for a place to live where the ordinary becomes extraordinary, and the bizarreness knows no bounds, then Saint Lucia is the perfect place for you. Just remember, once you step into this town, there's no guarantee you'll ever be the same again.