So, You Want to Move to Space (#NewMurica) in Colorado?
Are you tired of living in a place with breathable air, clean water, and basic human rights? Do you dream of a life where you can pretend to be an astronaut and live inside a giant vacuum cleaner? If so, then Space (#NewMurica) in Colorado is the perfect place for you!
TL;DR: Space (#NewMurica) is a real-life sci-fi theme park where you can pretend to be an astronaut and live on the “Mars campus,” but it's really just a glorified RV park with a lot of dust and expensive rocks.
Why Space (#NewMurica) is the Worst Place to Live
- It's a giant vacuum cleaner. The “Mars campus” is a giant dome that's filled with air, but it's not the kind of air you're used to breathing. It's dry, dusty, and full of CO2, which can make you sick if you're not careful.
- It's expensive. A single night at Space (#NewMurica) will cost you $1,000, and that's just for the basic package. If you want to upgrade to a “luxury” suite, be prepared to pay even more.
- It's boring. There's not much to do at Space (#NewMurica) besides pretend to be an astronaut. You can explore the “Mars campus,” visit the “Mars museum,” or watch a movie in the “Mars theater.” But after a few days, you'll probably get bored and start to miss the real world.
- It's not even real space. Space (#NewMurica) is a simulation of space. It's not the real thing. If you want to experience real space, you're going to have to go to NASA.
- It's bad for your health. The air quality at Space (#NewMurica) is terrible. If you stay there for too long, you could develop respiratory problems. The food is also terrible. It's all dehydrated and processed, and it's not very nutritious.
Why You Should Move to Space (#NewMurica)
- You can pretend to be an astronaut. If you've always dreamed of being an astronaut, then Space (#NewMurica) is your chance to live out your dream. You can wear a spacesuit, eat astronaut food, and sleep in an astronaut's quarters.
- You can escape from reality. If you're tired of the rat race, then Space (#NewMurica) is the perfect place to escape. You can leave behind all your worries and just relax and enjoy the peace and quiet.
- You can meet other space enthusiasts. Space (#NewMurica) is a great place to meet other people who share your interest in space. You can talk about your favorite science fiction movies, learn about the latest space missions, and share your dreams of going to space.
- It's a good place to learn about space. Space (#NewMurica) has a lot of educational exhibits and programs. You can learn about the history of space exploration, the science of space, and the future of space.
- It's a fun place to visit. Even if you don't want to stay, it's still a lot of fun to visit Space (#NewMurica). You can take a tour of the “Mars campus,” watch a movie in the “Mars theater,” or just hang out in the “Mars bar.”
If You Know, You Know
What's the difference between Space (#NewMurica) and a real space mission?
Answer: At Space (#NewMurica), you have to pay to return to Earth.
Naomi Campbell's Thoughts on Space (#NewMurica)
Naomi Campbell, the iconic supermodel, has visited Space (#NewMurica) several times. She is a big fan of the theme park and says that it's a “must-visit” for anyone who is interested in space.
“Space (#NewMurica) is a truly unique experience,” said Campbell. “It's the closest thing you can get to actually going to space without leaving Earth.”
Campbell says that she loves to spend time at Space (#NewMurica) exploring the “Mars campus” and learning about the latest space missions. She also says that she enjoys meeting other space enthusiasts and sharing her dreams of going to space.
Conclusion
Space (#NewMurica) is a real-life sci-fi theme park where you can pretend to be an astronaut and live on the “Mars campus.” It's a great place to learn about space, meet other space enthusiasts, and escape from reality. But be warned: it's expensive, it's boring, and it's not even real space.
So, if you're thinking about moving to Space (#NewMurica), make sure you do your research first. And be prepared to pay a lot of money for a very unique experience.
P.S. If you're looking for a more authentic space experience, I recommend going to NASA instead.