Brides: The Real Manatees of the Wedding World
Summary
Brides are like the manatees of the wedding world: slow-moving, clueless, and in need of constant attention. From their over-the-top dresses to their ridiculous demands, brides are a nuisance to everyone around them. So if you're planning to get married, do yourself a favor and avoid the bridezilla at all costs.
TL;DR
- Brides are like manatees: slow, clueless, and needy.
- Avoid the bridezilla at all costs.
Brides: A Case of the Gimmies
Brides have a reputation for being demanding. They want everything to be perfect on their big day, and they're not afraid to throw a tantrum if they don't get their way. From the dress to the flowers to the food, brides expect nothing but the best. And if you're not careful, they'll turn into the Bridezilla from hell.
Brides: The Entitlement Complex
Brides often act like they're entitled to special treatment. They think that everyone should bend over backward to make them happy. They're the center of the universe, and everyone else is just there to serve them. This entitlement complex can be annoying to everyone around them, and it can make the wedding planning process a nightmare.
Brides: The Royal We
Brides love to use the royal we. They talk about “our dress” and “our wedding” as if they're royalty. The truth is, the wedding is all about the bride. The groom is just a prop. But don't tell that to the bride. She'll have your head on a platter.
Brides: The Princess Syndrome
Brides often act like they're princesses. They expect to be treated like royalty, and they want everything to be perfect. They pout and cry when they don't get their way, and they're always complaining about something. If you're friends with a bride, be prepared to spend a lot of time listening to her whine.
Brides: The Wedding Industrial Complex
The wedding industry is a multi-billion dollar business. And brides are the ones who keep it afloat. They spend thousands of dollars on dresses, flowers, food, and entertainment. They're willing to pay top dollar for anything that will make their wedding day perfect. And this is why brides are so demanding. They know that they have the money to make their dreams come true.
Brides: The Happily Ever After Myth
Brides are often sold the dream of happily ever after. They're told that if they find the right guy and have the perfect wedding, they'll live happily ever after. But the truth is, marriage isn't always easy. There are ups and downs, and there are times when you'll want to strangle your spouse. But if you're lucky, you'll find someone who you can laugh with, cry with, and grow old with. And that's the best kind of happily ever after.
If you know, you know…
What do Brides and The Sphinx have in common?
…They both have big heads.
The Huge Manatee: A Metaphor for Brides
The Huge Manatee is a fitting metaphor for Brides. They're both big, slow, and in need of constant attention. They're also both a nuisance to everyone around them. So if you're planning to get married, do yourself a favor and avoid the Bridezilla at all costs.
The Huge Manatee is a reminder that not all things are what they seem. Just because something is big and beautiful doesn't mean it's worth your time. So choose your brides carefully. And if you find yourself dealing with a Bridezilla, remember: it's not you, it's them.
